Weekly Tweets throughout 2010-02-06

Fatherhood Friday Blogs Recap - February 6, 2010

The blogosphere was light this week regarding fatherhood blog posts.

Thus, I would like to highlight two blog posts from upcoming interviewees, RonAmok and Mochadad.

For you social media types, RonAmok wrote a comparative article on historical United States censuses and potential business communication censuses.  Ron focuses on performing the proper analysis of understanding the migratory patterns of your customers so you can stay connected with their interests.

For you dancing fathers, Mochadad asked the question, “How do you foster an appreciation for music in your children?” My response, “Clean up time is music time” and whenever it is time for Yo Gabba Gabba!

Enjoy your weekend!

Week 2 of Joe Webb’s Interview

Interview (continued)

What do most aspiring leaders not have that keeps them from becoming leaders?

A good leader can hear the cries of his people and speak to them in a way that they understand and believe is true.  Once again, too many “non-leaders” are me-focused opposed to us-focused.

Can you give an example of a leader that “walks the walk” (and “talks the talk”)?

Well, I just saw Invictus so I’d say Nelson Mandela.  Unfortunately, this world’s government is very much populated with popular parties interested in their own self-interests.

What happens when a leader does not “walk the walk”?  Do they lose authenticity or become more authentic regarding their humanity?

I don’t like finding major flaws in our leaders.  Only the most basic flaws are acceptable.  As much as I loved Clinton, adultery is a major flaw.  I’d prefer my role models (and those that my son end up admiring) to be as flawless as possible.  Flaws may help some people relate, but flaws tend to exist because of bad choices.  I don’t like my heroes making bad choices, just dealing with bad situations admirably.

Do you believe anyone can be a leader?  Why?

I believe it begins at birth and how you are raised.  Some that overcome tremenduous struggle and hardships become the best leaders.  Some that are raised with endless love, support and resources are amazing leaders.  Some that grow up in a negative environment have a hardened heart and are terrible, hateful leaders.  Some grow up with silver spoons in their mouths and never learn what it takes to fight for something.  We are all products of our environment and that shapes our future selves.

What separates leaders from followers?

A leader speaks up even when he/she knows it may not be in their best interest, but in the best interest of others.  A follower speaks up after that person.

joe_webb_2

What Makes You Come Alive

Ok… so I have listened to an interview of Seth Godin by Andrew Warner at least four times now.

I have been interrupted during some viewings by family, work, phone calls, emails… just plain old life stuff.

Needless to say, I decided to post this interview of Seth Godin on my blog to help others understand, cope, meditate, figure out–whatever word you use to describe, “finding out who you are and being all you can be”.

I am convinced that we are all called to do something great. This is not just the positive mental side of me, this is a deep-rooted conviction in my soul.

That something great is individual to each of us. That something great could be being a father, it could be being a man, it could be being a husband, it could be being a writer, it could be being a speaker, it could be being an entrepreneur, it could be … (insert what your passion is and what makes you come alive). The bottom line is that you do that thing and do that thing with all of you. As Seth mentions in the interview, do not be someone else. Be who you are and the rest will fall in place.

Now, I realize that some of you reading this blog post are sitting there wondering and pontificating, well, maybe there is not something that makes me come alive. And to that, my response is, you are lazy and a liar.

You are lazy because we are all called to do something great, get off of your butt and do it. Society will tell you no, that is crazy. Your closest peers will tell you that your gift could be better served doing something more profitable. You are a liar because you are too scared to face your fears and do what it is that tugs on you, that wakes you up in the middle of the night begging you to take the next step forward to your desire, but the doubts in your head stop you from taking that next step.

Now, go do what makes you come alive.

(But, watch the video below first)

Weekly Tweets throughout 2010-01-30

Fatherhood Freak Out

All new dads-to-be,

Do not freak out like the VlogBrothers (also known as NerdFighters.com).

Fatherhood is definitely a momentous occasion and changes your life forever.  However, enjoy the ride because it definitely goes too quick and is not worth the stress below.

Enjoy the video nonetheless.  Enjoy Friday.  Enjoy fatherhood.

Interview: Joe Webb

joe_webbBackground

Joe Webb is by far one of the funniest digital automotive professionals on the planet.  If you do not believe me, check out his “Switch with Me” video.

Joe and I have never met face-to-face, but we have discussed (through the magic of technology) various automotive practices and principles of success.  During these discussions, I felt Joe would be a great person to receive insight from regarding leadership and marriage.

For the next two weeks, Joe will share his insights regarding how marriages can stay together, what is love, missing leadership qualities in today’s society and the difference between leaders and followers.

Stay tuned.  Joe provides some great knowledge for all.

Thanks again for your words Joe.  Now, onto Joe’s thoughts on love and marriage.

Interview

What have you learned and implemented to maintain such a lasting relationship with your wife?

I met my wife a year out of college.  I learned from my divorced parents that the key to sustaining a long relationship is:

What advice would you give to someone interested in getting married?

Tiger Wood’s answer is a stronger prenup.  However, I’d say that you should make sure you get along with each other’s family, make sure you both agree to contribute to chores, thank them endlessly for just being them, and have enough money to do everything in the short term that will keep your lives uncomplicated.

What is the difference between listening and hearing your spouse?

In my opinion, listening is when you are told to do something and you do it (or are told something) and offer your ear and maybe later a basic response.  Hearing is when you do the above and realize why she is really sharing the information with you in the first place.  When you hear her, you understand her mindset.  (And yes, “crazy” can be a mindset.)

Why do you think married couples do not stay together?

I believe married couples do not stay together for two reasons:

  1. it is too damn easy to get out of relationships — too much of an alternative
  2. our generation is unendingly selfish.  It is the ME generation for the most part and too many people forget that marriage is not about one person.

What is the difference between love and staying in love?

Love is easy.  Staying in love is hard.  Love can be triggered by chemicals in the brain.  However, only a heart has the power to keep you in love.

(End of part 1.  Next week, part 2.)

Weekly Tweets throughout 2010-01-25

Interview: Galen Gordon

galen_gordonBackground

The most outgoing and down-to-earth person during my schoolboy years is about to bless you with deep and simple insight on manhood and raising girls.  Galen Gordon took the time to answer questions about how he seeks to challenge his daughters and create an impactful, positive and purpose-filled environment for them.  Galen has true words of wisdom you must read.  Thanks again for sharing Galen!

Interview

Define manhood.

To me manhood is the ability to stand strong in your convictions and the
willingness to sacrifice for the betterment of those you support.  Manhood is also the ability to show restraint over temptations.  A real man recognizes the importance of the decisions he makes.  But, also I believe manhood comes with humility and understanding that I don’t always have the answer and I can’t always solve each issue without help from a neighbor or loved one.  Sometimes, we think being a man is just being tough and being the ‘rock’.  There are moments and issues in our life when, as a man I must show the ability to say, ‘help me’.

How is manhood portrayed positively in your life?

In my life, manhood is portrayed by respecting my elders, even at my age.  Respecting women and not condoning violence toward them or others is another way manhood is portrayed.  Manhood is portrayed by consistently working to provide for myself and those I support, not depending on others to make my way for me.  I see too many men ‘hustling’ women and others instead of getting their ‘hustle’ on by working harder at their jobs.

How do you exemplify positive manhood to the next generation?

I continue to stay involved with youth activities and youth organizations.  I’ve always believed it was extremely important to share my knowledge and
experiences with the youth.  I think our kids need to see ‘average’ men and the reality of life for most of us.  They need to see the struggles and how we deal with them.  This is the type of life most of our youth will experience–not, flashy cars and houses on the hill.

Define fatherhood.

To me fatherhood is creating a truth for my children.  Expressing in word
and action that every decision we make has a consequence and every action
has a reaction.  Some choices we make will impact us for a lifetime.  I believe part of being a father is having the confidence to tell my children, “No”.  It seems too many of us are trying to be friends with our kids and make up for what our parents didn’t do for us.  I just don’t believe that is helpful in the long run.  It is my duty to protect my children, but not to shelter them.  As a father, I must prepare them for the realities of the world, but also expose them to their opportunities and help them make goals for their own life successes.

How many children do you have?

I have two daughters. KeMijah - 12 and Freedom - 7

What is your most memorable moment as a father?

I have several memorable moments, but one is probably the night KeMijah
(two at the time) was sick and I had given her medicine and a massage and she was throwing up and just laying on the bed, helpless.  She had never really been this (bad) sick with me before.  She just began talking so she couldn’t really explain too much to me.  I was trying to get her to sleep.  She looked up at me and said, “…Daddy, I need you!”.  Oh MY…I just laid down with her and held her tight.  We both fell right to sleep.  It really dawned on me how much I needed to step things up in her life and in general.

Any final words or comments?

I’m grateful to God for bringing me daughters.  Yes, I know the troublesome years are only beginning, but I don’t know if I would have been as active a father if KeMijah would have been a boy.  I don’t know.  I was only 20 at the time and just getting ready to do things 20 year olds do.  I hope I would have been the same or even better, but I honestly don’t know.  Before KeMijah, I always thought I wanted a boy so I could dress him like me and he would play football.  But, I don’t believe I would have the patience for
boys.  My kids do what I ask of them and I don’t have to chase them around or anything like I see many of my friends doing with their boys.  I don’t know, but, I do know I love my babygirls!

Weekly Tweets throughout 2010-01-09